{"product_id":"witty-yeti-hilarious-bad-parking-cards-total-annihilation-edition-50-pk-5-x-10","title":"Total Annihilation Edition Bad Parking Revenge Cards","description":"\u003cp\u003eHow many times have you asked yourself \"Is it really that hard?\" as you try not to door ding the terribly parked car next to yours? Whether you deputize yourself or give the gag gift of parking revenge, these bad parking cards will help win the war against arguably the simplest part of driving - parking the damn car.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou will receive 50 Witty Yeti bad parking cards, which include five copies of these ten different hilarious and insulting phrases.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThis is the trail of tears of parking jobs\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eI've seen people with Parkinson's color inside the lines better than you parked this car.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf I ever parked this incompetently I would just kill myself. Though, if you tried, I'm sure you'd fail at that too.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eHellen Keller could have parked this car better than you.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eI feel sorry for your wife because if you fuck like you park, you must never get it in\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf Hitler were still alive, he would commend this parking job.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDo you work at Planned Parenthood? Cause this is an abortion of a parking job.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYour parking job is like cancer. Only worse, because it won't kill you.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eGiven this parking job, you would undoubtedly win the special Olympics of parking.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf your car was a plane and the parking spot the twin towers, 9\/11 wouldn't have happened.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eGET QUIET, SWIFT REVENGE ON ASSHOLE DRIVERS. Don't have time to wait around for every bad parker to come back to their car? Leave a card so even if you're long gone, your angry sentiment lingers.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBE AS OFFENSIVE AS THEIR PARKING. Tired of assholes parking like idiots? Get revenge by unleashing your anger and leaving no room for doubt as to how you feel about their shitty driving skills.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eGUARANTEED FOR LIFE. We offer a No-Nonsense Lifetime Satisfaction Guarantee on all of our gag gifts. If at any point you're not 100% happy, just send us an email, and we promise to make it right!\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eGIVE LAUGHTER AND BE THE LIFE OF THE PARTY. Make everyone jealous of your gift giving and hilariously satisfy righteous road rage anger with this perfect stocking stuffer or white elephant gift.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eTHICK DURABLE PAPER = LONG LASTING INSULTS. Our idiot parking cards have the look and feel of actual business cards, making your insults last longer in inclement weather and look super professional.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Witty Yeti","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":15840004898918,"sku":"8J-Z4PK-ULQ8","price":10.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1675\/9521\/products\/0473755d-af3d-5551-b61a-8f92a5f71fa6.jpg?v=1642654764","url":"https:\/\/witty-yeti.myshopify.com\/products\/witty-yeti-hilarious-bad-parking-cards-total-annihilation-edition-50-pk-5-x-10","provider":"Witty Yeti","version":"1.0","type":"link"}